All of my greatest transformations have come with the willingness to endure the quiet storm that always comes right before the transformation.
I say “quiet storm” because the silent moments right before the miracle are some of the most deafening. They just hit differently.
I think about the first moment I decided to be curious instead of defensive, or the first time I put down my phone instead of texting someone I’d had a “friends with benefits” situation with, or the first time I set a boundary… in all of these moments I felt like I was giving up a drug, and in some ways, I was. In that moment of making the choice that would ultimately be both expansive and empowering, I felt like I was going to die.
Dramatic much?! Right? But seriously, though… a part of me did have to die. In all the moments where you choose a new behaviour, you are flooded with both possibility and grief. The joy of what you can now create, and the grief for recognizing that you waited this long to choose it. If you don’t know how to sit with either or both of these emotions, you are being asked to become someone who can.
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