I dive into all things relational with no topic off-limits. Read ‘em and weep (with heartache or laughter - it’s cool either way) and shift your perspective word-by-word.
“When we are so sure. We can get into such trouble.”~ Kōshin Paley Ellison I heard Zen monk and MFT Koshin Paley Ellison say this in his book Untangled. It had me thinking about when I become sure and certain. And I wonder, what are you sure and certain about? I know that for me,
Today, I’m coming at you with a solo episode, and I’m gonna dive deep into the subject of commitment. Not just commitment in the sense of committed romantic relationships, but the fear of commitment. And not just the fear of commitment from other people, like being in relationship with people who are afraid of commitment…
In today’s Solo Episode, I want to talk about something that has been very prevalent for me since the birth of my son, and that I’ve talked about a bit on social media—what I call Operation Reverse Dad Bod. I wanted to give you more specifics into what I’ve been doing and how I’ve accessed
When I interviewed psychotherapist Britt Frank, the author of “The Science of Stuck,” she mentioned that when we feel frozen in a pattern and unable to change, it’s because it’s a trauma response. We’re in the “freeze” part of fight, flight, freeze, fawn. From a biological perspective, we don’t move forward because our nervous system
Recently I was talking to a friend about their relationship challenges, and they were expressing how their financial hardships have impacted their relationship. In the discussion, he shared that his inability to provide was bringing a lot of shame for him, and his partner wanting to leave because he was feeling really challenged in his
I’ve been crushing a lot of business books lately. I love playing with the universe and really trying to understand more fully how to generate wealth — and how that relates to love, family and life. It’s interesting how when it comes to making money, one of the beliefs I bump up against is that
People trust people who have boundaries. This is a strange paradox to hold because the absence of boundaries is sourced from the need to people-please… so when one decides to bring boundaries into their lives and/or their workplace, the fear is that the relationships will shift, and they may lose connections. This can be true.
“When you use a method to find and open the gate with a love, you can’t get trapped in the method. The method has to die. It has to fall apart. So that you can realize that the opening was always there.” ~ Ram Dass. When we find love and joy through another, why does
Many of you ask, “When are you going to write a book?” Well, that moment is NOW! It gives me SO MUCH PLEASURE and JOY to announce that Kylie and I’s book, Liberated Love, is available for pre-order! And YES, you can preorder the Audible too! (I’m an audiobook lover… so that had to happen!) This book dives
When we are certain of unconditional love, not just from another but also from ourselves, we become warriors of the heart. We will leap beyond what we once conceived as possible because a love we’ve never known has shattered the paradigm of the upper limits of what we thought connection could be and bring. Unfortunately,
I was recently watching a friend of mine, Kristin Hallett, speaking about death and what it means to truly live. Kristin works with people exploring how they want to be remembered… whether that’s accompanying them on their way out, or working with someone who today wants to embrace living a life with no regrets. During her
“I don’t know what to do, Mark!” If I had a nickel for every DM I’ve gotten with those words…. Well, I’d have a lot of nickels. It feels to me like being stuck in a particular area of life is something we all experience at some point — or perhaps at many times throughout
I get asked a lot how I built a following of over 1.3 million people and a podcast that gets 500k downloads per month… Where did I get lucky? Did I go viral, and that changed it all?
I met a woman last week who went back to work three weeks after she had her baby. THREE WEEKS! This had me thinking: A lot of our social issues, especially in the US, are due to the fact that we do not prioritize the relationship of a new mother and child…
A company or career that doesn’t align is like a relationship that doesn’t align. Trying to force things that don’t fit is often something we learn as children. Our wounding doesn’t just limit us personally; it also shows up in our professional lives. What I find to be helpful whenever faced with conundrums like this
Have you ever woken up in a relationship (or after you just got out of one) and asked yourself questions like, “When did I forget about me?” Or, “When was the last time I even considered what I wanted or what I needed?!” This is typical of so many of us. Why? Because, more often than not, it’s what’s modelled
Relationships require compromise, right? I remember hearing this a lot growing up. And while I think it is true, what is not specified is the difference between compromise and self-abandonment. We have people throwing themselves under the bus in relationships, wondering why they feel sick, depleted, resentful, have auto-immune mysteries, and are exhausted, when all
In today’s modern world, where we’re being exposed to more toxins and stress than ever before, it feels like mysterious illnesses and chronic diagnoses are the new norm. Often, conventional medicine doesn’t seem to help, either. How many of you have been rushed through an appointment with your GP, only to be given a prescription
All of my greatest transformations have come with the willingness to endure the quiet storm that always comes right before the transformation. I say “quiet storm” because the silent moments right before the miracle are some of the most deafening. They just hit differently. I think about the first moment I decided to be curious instead
We spend so much of our lives trying to figure out why we have certain coping strategies, or why we do what we do in relationship. To me, it almost always comes back to ONE thing: We’ve given our power away (or feel as though it was taken). The way we deal with the pain
To love without knowing how to love wounds the person we love. ~ Thich Nhat Hanh I remember when I first read the above quote from Thich Nhat Hanh, I was floored. I had this instant recognition that comes when truth is delivered in words that cut right through the psyche and straight into the
Relationships are THE MOST POTENT vehicle for growth and transformation. If we’re willing to turn towards our partnerships, both past and present, seeking to understand why we do what we do (and for our partners to do the same), we can heal the wounds and behaviours we have that hold us back and create a
Recently Kylie shared with me an excerpt from Francis Weller’s book “The Wild Edge Of Sorrow: Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred Work of Grief”. Such powerful words from one of my favourite teachers that hit me right in the core. Here it is:
I’ve personally experienced the impact of social media on my psyche. And, getting to witness and share social media with over a million people has offered a lens that I can’t pretend I don’t see. Social media comes for ALL of you. Left to its own devices and algorithms it will not leave any of
I used to think that grief was something that you have purely as a result of losing love. While that is certainly true, now I see that it is also present as we open to receiving love. I think this has many dimensions in the context of romantic love:
The other day I was playing with my nephew who is 14 months old. I watched as he went from playing with building blocks to little farm animals to anything and everything. Construction. Destruction. Repeat. It was really magnificent to try to see the world through his eyes, and even more interesting, to observe what
I know people loathe things like “New year, new you” and all the things about the New Year. But to be honest, I love this time of year. I love opportunities to reflect. Whether it’s with the seasons changing that remind us of the cycles of life, or years turning over, there is such transformational
With every year that passes I like to write a reflective post about what has transpired and what I’ve learned. Perhaps through reading this you will find some reflections of your own, and I would love to hear in the comments — what have been your greatest lessons and learnings in the past year?
Recently I had the honour of interviewing the author Martha Beck, and I was struck by how full of life and joy she is. This woman has a past and a story (that continues to unfold) that would inspire anyone to change and transform their life. I encourage you to check out the episode and subscribe to the podcast as we
I was consuming, or rather, consumed by, Mary Oliver’s work recently via the On Being podcast, and I wanted to elaborate on what her words brought forward for me. There is a saying that one does not have to understand the words they read to infuse them into their being — as the words are written in a