I have found myself living into this question many times in my life. And while what you’re reading here is going to be focused on romantic relationships as the context, I want you to consider this process and exploration for any moment in your life where you’re unsure as to which direction to go.
I’m going to teach you what I’ve learned from some of the hardest moments of my life, and also having walked thousands of people through exploring this painful and often debilitating conundrum.
So let’s start where it started:
When I was in my twenties I was engaged. I didn’t want to get engaged. But I did love her. And she was (and is) an incredible person. And this is what made it so much harder…
Because if you’re in a relationship with a douche-canoe, or someone who’s abusive, unkind, disrespectful, narcissistic, an addict who won’t get sober, a serial cheater… etc… the decision is actually pretty easy. So, let me save you from reading the rest of this article — unless they’re capable of taking responsibility for themselves and actually changing, don’t just walk out of their life… run. And if you want to dive even deeper… keep going.
Okay… back to 27 year old confused Mark. Despite her being a great human, I felt lost. I wanted someone to tell me what to do. I wished that she would cheat on me so that I could leave and not feel guilty. I pushed her away. I became anxious and depressed. I drank more. I surfed the internet more.
And what I searched mainly was, “How do you know if she’s the one?”
How do you know? How do you decide with such a ginormous and gargantuan choice confronting you? What if you choose wrong?
Well… let me tell you… or better yet, let me guide you so that you can know the answer yourself.
Here are 5 things I know to be true that may be helpful in you coming to what is true for you.
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