It can sound kind of odd to think that it’s actually you who is attracting people who want situationships… and that unconsciously you’re doing it because you’re afraid of finding someone who can meet you in the depths.
Because what lives next to the depths is your unhealed pain.
Now look, I’m not blaming you for your Tinder/Bumble/Hinge matches being emotionally unavailable or just wanting to bang. 💥
But I am saying that if you keep finding yourself matching, going on dates with, and progressing to situationships and “friends with benefits”…. Then you, my friend, have been purposefully creating upper limits for your relationship possibilities because you’re (un)consciously terrified of what lives beyond your conundrum with casualness.
I’m going to explore the four things that cause us to end up in situationships (and how to heal them), so that you can finally choose the love that chooses you… so, let’s dive in:
- You haven’t fully healed pain from your past.
We avoid love that can meet us because we’re afraid of having to open our hearts again… we’re afraid that when we do, we will again be let down, abandoned, rejected, or hurt in any myriad of ways. Unconsciously, this is brilliant… it seems like we have standards that are too high or are just having “bad luck” in dating when actually, it’s most often us who are purposefully getting in our own way.
Finish the sentence… “When I love people they _______.” That will tell you what you’re afraid to relive or recreate.
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