Lately, I’ve been thinking about the idea of a “suspended initiation” and went back into the archives of a podcast episode I did with Francis Weller where he spoke about this idea…
Get ready, because this is a zinger:
“There’s a term that means something has been precipitated and you are not participating in that. And so you never arrive on the new territory, and that term is limonoid. It’s like an unfinished initiation or a suspended initiation. Something has rocked your world, but rather than going through the process of disintegration and re-emergence, we backpedal and grasp onto old strategies of surviving and old patterns. We reinforce them, even. And we want to drink more. We won’t allow ourselves to go through the process of change.
I mean, three things happen in any true initiation. There’s a radical severance from the world that you once knew, like when that cancer diagnosis is given. You’ve left that old world. You’re no longer living in a healthy, “I have no worries about my longevity” place, and suddenly you’re now in this other world. There’s a radical alteration in your sense of identity. I’m no longer who I thought I was. And there is a profound realization that you can never go back to the world that was.
Now, in that disrupted initiation, you try and go back to the world that was. You try to reclaim that. And the medical system and I think psychological systems are complicit in that. We’re going to get you back to where you were before this happens.
Well, what a waste. You’re going to waste a good heart attack. You’re going to waste a good cancer diagnosis. You’re going to waste a good divorce. These things are not meant to take you back to where you were. They’re meant to escort you into something radically altered.”
Damn.
I wanted to send this to you so you can reflect on this point of inquiry:
What initiations are you delayed entering or exiting? Where are you gripping to the past out of fear?
Allowing our inner and outer world to align is where peace and integrity are found. Anything else is just going to lead to more pain and disconnection so as to finally provide the circumstances that make it not optional for you to answer the call.
Much love,
Mark
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