Recently I was talking to a friend about their relationship challenges, and they were expressing how their financial hardships have impacted their relationship. In the discussion, he shared that his inability to provide was bringing a lot of shame for him, and his partner wanting to leave because he was feeling really challenged in his business — this had him feeling like the relationship was only as secure as his income. With the stress of the financial situation already being a lot for him to hold, now his relationship was dissolving too.
We choose to be in relationship for many reasons, and financial reasons are often a large factor for people, whether they like to admit it or are even conscious of it.
Look, I’m not shaming the need for security, but if at the basis of the relationship success is financial success, that’s a conditional relationship. And a relationship that ends the moment we encounter financial struggles doesn’t have the psychological safety that is required to fully open up and surrender into love and connection. Imagine hearing amidst your financials stresses, “Hey babe. No matter what happens financially, we’re a team, and we’ll figure it out. We’ll live under a bridge if we have to.”
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