17th October 2022
Healing Through Infidelity with Rainier Wylde & Kristi Born

I'm Mark
Human Connection Specialist, Speaker, Author, Coach, Podcast Host and founder of Create The Love. 
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Liberated Love


In this episode, I had the pleasure of chatting with power couple Rainier Wylde and Kristi Born. We discuss how their relationship has evolved through infidelity, relational pain as a potent catalyst for transformation, the beauty of being honest with ourselves and our partner, and viewing ruptures as an invitation to truth and an opportunity to really see and understand each other.

About Rainier & Kristi:

Rainier Wylde is an author, teacher, and speaker. He has embraced life for all it is, celebrating its highs and learning from its lows. Rainier has managed a Fortune 500 company and built businesses; he has also elegantly blown them up, burned them down, and started over from scratch. Studying with Zen masters and Sufi mystics, Rainier founded and participated in neo-monastic communities for many years, becoming a spiritual director to both individuals and groups. He holds a masters degree in psychology and has spent countless hours working with others in navigating the human soul. Through the various positions he has held, Rainier discovered that life must be claimed to hold any worth. His work is to inspire others to live, fully and deeply, in the here and now.

Kristi Born is a marriage and family therapist, relationship coach and teacher. She has worked with diverse populations and a wide variety of age groups. As a graduate school professor and popular educator, Kristi thrills in bringing people together to discuss topics that unleash their power and minimize their shame. She believes in systemic thinking and uncovering how relationships are containers for healing and exponential personal growth. Kristi specializes in the art of couple’s therapy and relationship healing. Through this work, she helps couples create their own designer relationships; conscious and wholehearted partnerships. She finds joy in partnering with Rainier Wylde to use their personal relational journey to help any and every person accept and step into their own power, telling a beautiful story of their own. Together they host the podcast Love Like Hell, exploring the modern landscape of intimacy and union.


  • Love and relational pain as a potent catalyst for transformation
  • Why we sometimes hide our past from our current partners
  • Why we often jump into relationships too fast
  • The beauty of being honest with ourselves and our partner and where to begin when you have a history of tiptoeing around the truth
  • Viewing ruptures in relationship as an invitation to truth and an opportunity really see and understand each other
  • The importance of holding onto yourself and your identity while in relationship
  • The impact of relationship transformation on kids and what they can learn from seeing a marriage with a foundation of truth

00:00 Intro

03:28 Entering into relationships unconsciously

05:00 When dysfunction is normalized

08:16 Love as a catalyst for transformation

14:23 Fear of knowing your partner’s past

20:45 Why we often jump from relationship to relationship

23:36 Liberation through truth

28:38 Talking about things as they arise vs. burying them

30:10 Ruptures are an opportunity

40:04 How did the community react to the truth?

46:31 Wanting the best for your partner

49:57 Relationships are not risk-free

58:50 Impact of relationship transformation on kids


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